Resident Adviser Future Outtake
by addicted-to-romione-bedward
Summary: Bella's left to go help bedridden pregnant Alice until the babies are born. Leaving Edward in charge of their children, who knows what trouble will ensue? It's anyone's guess how he will survive Bella being gone more than a month. Will he survive, or will he need help? What kind of trouble can he get himself into now? Will he break down and call for help. Fandom 4 Children entry.


**Title: **_Resident Adviser – Future Outtake_

**Author Name: **_addicted-to-romione-bedward_

**Rating: **_M_

**Word Count:** 12.426

**Pairing: **_Edward/Bella_

**Beta'd By:** _TeamAllTwilight_

**Banner Made By: **_Judy E. Cullen_

**Summary/Disclaimer:** Bella's left to go help bedridden pregnant Alice until the babies are born. Leaving Edward in charge of their children, who knows what trouble will ensue? It's anyone's guess how he will survive Bella being gone more than a month. Will he survive, or will he need help? What kind of trouble can he get himself into now? Will he break down and call for help. Fandom 4 Children entry.

It has been almost two months since Bella left.

Two months of pure hell.

Forty-seven days of hell.

One thousand one hundred and twenty-eight hours of hell.

I was too tired to really count down the minutes; besides, I was never good at Math.

Being alone with four devil-sent children and one extremely hyper dog was more than I could take.

I wished I could hate Alice for taking Bella from my side, but she was close to her due date. She was having twins and she is so tiny. Everyone was worried.

Mom was with her. Why did she need my wife?

I could barely take care of myself, but four kids? Two of them nearly one year old, one five year old trying to act innocent when I knew better, and a very sketchy nine year old and I didn't even want to think about the dog. Together they'd put me in an early grave.

Everything started with a phone call on my birthday; exactly when I was enjoying my Bella gift on the counter while the kids were shipped off to their nana and papa's.

She answered, because the damn thing kept ringing. It wasn't going to stop me from enjoying Bella wrapped in a red bowtie.

"Oh my God!" Bella shrieked, pushing me away. Here I thought I was distracting her from the phone. "I'm on my way to you! Stay strong, Alice!"

That kind of killed the mood. She apologized a thousand times, but insisted that she had to be there for her friend.

Alice was put on bed rest, and everyone that knew my sister knew that she was unlikely to listen. But she had to now. The babies almost outweighed her. Last time I saw a picture of her, she looked like a human barrel. I was worried for her safety, but the stubborn woman decided to take the pregnancy to the end. That resulted in Mom and Bella moving in with her.

After driving Bella to the airport, I went to bring the kids home.

Ed looked relieved to have them out of his hair. I was just beginning to panic that I'd have to deal with them alone. Liz insisted to coming with me realizing I was going to do something stupid with all of them, but I declined. I had to prove that I could do it.

So my forty-seven days of hell stared.

Day one was just the beginning. Little did I know at the time.

I woke up at some ungodly hour to wails from the baby monitor. The twins loved to cry at the same time. It was totally okay when Bella was with me. Not now.

Feeling more than helpless, I grabbed them each in one arm and went to the kitchen to heat milk. I had to move to the couch to feed them and after thinking until I fried my brain, I carried the boys to the couch, left them there and rushed after the milk. Thank God nothing happened. Once we were situated comfortably, they began to eat and I dozed off.

"Da! Daa!"

I cracked an eye open and looked at one of the twins. It was difficult to distinguish them.

"Yeah?" I mumbled.

Of course, he didn't need anything. He just loved to annoy me. They were done with their milk so I took them back to my bed.

"Daddy!" Shoulder shake. "Daddy!" Vigorous shoulder shake. "Daaaddy!" Body shake and some jumping on the bed.

Dammit. I was tired. "Yes, Abby?" I grunted.

"Cody needs out and I'm hungry."

"I'll alert CNN," I muttered rolling on my other side and nearly trapping one of the twins under me. Great. This wasn't my day.

Mondays were horrible.

After taking the twins to the kitchen with me, knowing they'd wake up soon, I opened the backdoor and told Cody to go out.

"You have to help me, Abby," I told her seriously. "You will, right?"

"Of course." She nodded, smiling brightly.

"Good. Take out the cereal bowls, spoons and my mug."

I deposited the boys in their high chairs and they were still sleepy so it would be quiet for a while. Like two minutes. I worked quickly on their breakfast.

"How many teaspoons of coffee?" Abby asked quietly.

"Three," I said automatically then realized she wanted to make coffee for me. Aw. Wasn't she sweet? "I love you, you know that?" I told her, kissing her head.

"Dad, do you want to talk about that? I always win. I love you more."

"Right." I nodded, chuckling. "And that would be three sugars in my mug along with some milk," I added.

"Cold or hot?"

"Cold milk. You can put milk in your bowl then shove it into the microwave oven, for you and your bother," I advised.

We worked in relative silence. I had managed to take only one sip from my coffee before I was attacked with the sticky, smelly food the twins ate.

Cody returned some time later and started moving his bowl around the kitchen, making my ears bleed with the scratching of the metal on the tile. Abby took pity and went to fill it with food and water.

We were going to get along just great if she would help me all the time Bella was gone.

Danny appeared in the kitchen with the worst case of bed hair I'd seen in my life. After grabbing his bowl and cereal box, he went to watch cartoons. I'd indulge him, though Bella insisted he wasn't allowed to do that.

When everyone was washed and it looked like we hadn't had breakfast, we regrouped in the living room.

"So what do you guys want to do today?" I asked, plopping on the couch.

"Play hide and seek," Danny told me on a hopeful tone.

"Sounds nice. Do you want to play too?" I asked the twins, grabbing one's toe. "It's gonna be fun. I bet."

An hour later, I had been found again. When the hell did I lose my hiding sense? I used to hide behind the door all the time, and no one found me. But I guess my kids were smarter than Emmett.

In one last attempt to hide really well, I shifted between the kitchen wall and fridge when I saw it was already occupied by Danny. He threw me a nasty glare.

"Sorry," I whispered. "Can I hide with you?"

"No."

"Abby won't find us."

"Daaad! Tommy needs a change, I think. Daad? It's time-out from the game."

I laughed and left my hiding spot. "Where are you?" I asked, looking in the living room. She wasn't there.

"Their room!"

Once both twins had new diapers, we continued our game. Of course, they didn't actually hide anywhere. They kept running around and yelling.

Bella had cooked a monstrous lunch for my birthday. We didn't get to it, so I had food for at least two days.

After lunch came my favorite part of the day. Nap time. Abby refused to sleep because she was too old to nap. Okay, whatever suits her. I was so napping.

"Oh, you're sleeping?" I heard her saying disappointed not half an hour after everyone was asleep.

"I'd sleep if you, young lady, wouldn't bug me," I teased her, grabbing her hand and making her fall on top of me. "Sleep."

"Daddy, I have a question about school."

"It's summer, Princess. Sleep."

"Dad!"

Oh. My. God. "What question?"

My nap turned out in elementary Math problems. It was laughable how easy the problems were, but I guess they were difficult for me as well when I was her age.

By the time we were done, I was ready for my nap. Just then Danny barged in my room with his fake wooden sword, demanding a re-match of our duel a few days ago. I was so looking forward tonight's sleep.

Abby finished her Math homework, trying not to laugh at us. I had a pot on my head while Danny had a strainer. My weapon was the rolling pin and my make-shift shield was a tin. Bella will probably kill me if she saw me. And because Abby probably wanted me dead, she gave up studying and started taking pictures of us.

When Danny won fair and square, poking me in the stomach with his sword, I went to work on dinner. It was too quiet in here so after looking around, I didn't see Cody.

"Kids, is Cody there?" Let's hope he wasn't outside when I closed the door.

"Nope!" Abby shouted.

"Can you look for him?" I shouted back, stirring the pasta.

A few minutes later she appeared in the doorway, shaking her head. "Can't find him. You locked the door again?"

"It was totally by accident," I told her.

"Mom will kill you," she muttered going to open the back door.

Sure enough, Cody zoomed inside to his basket. He should have barked, but then again I wouldn't have heard him from the other side of the house.

"Make a list, won't you? She can kill me only once, luckily."

"She can make it a slow and painful death." Abby smirked.

"Abigail!" I gasped. "You're supposed to be on my side!"

She grinned and skipped out of the kitchen. After taking the pasta out and leaving them on the strainer above the sink, I went to Cody.

"You forgive me, right? I'm sorry." I rubbed his muzzle. He closed his eyes, groaning. "It won't happen again," I promised, rubbing his big head in my hands. Like always, after our play-time, I was full of slobber.

Dinner went well, and by the time everyone was in bed, I was ready to drop dead. After my shower, I shuffled to the kitchen and put a huge X over the day 21. One day down, who knows how many to go? Maybe Bella wasn't going to stay long.

She hadn't even called me. So, after sliding under the sheet, I called her.

"Hey, honey! Is everyone okay there?"

"Define okay," I mumbled.

She laughed. "They can be a handful, I know, but I trust you."

"They're going to kill me, Bella!" I whined.

"You'll be fine. Alice doesn't understand the words bed rest. She's huge, Edward!"

"I'm sure. Give me some ideas how to keep them under control," I begged.

"Play something nice. Something everyone can participate in," she explained.

"Even the twins?" I asked surprised.

"No, not them. You can play…Twister?"

"Did you lose your fucking mind, woman?" I asked really worried. She only laughed at me again. "Seriously."

"Hop-scotch."

"Where? In the middle of the street?"

"Go to the park. I know you can do this," she said seriously.

"You have too much faith in me. Do you know how long you'll be there? I miss you." I was pathetic.

"Until after she gives birth."

"Sorry? I didn't hear you," I said panicked. "We're losing the connection."

"Edward, don't be a baby. Call Liz if things get out of control. I have to stay with Alice. You have to see how lost Jasper is, and you mother…well, she's acting like a mom. Too worried, too stressed. I have to be here to balance them all."

Because she was my little, compassionate Bella. "Fucking perfect."

"We'll talk every night. It will be okay. You can call me anytime if you need anything."

After a few more encouragements, we hung up.

I was so, so fucked.

The second day was similar with the first one, and so was the whole first week. I slept only about four hours every night, no naptime, lots of coffee, and a healthy dose of Google on what games we could play. It wasn't as helpful as I originally thought. My old friend was disappointing me.

Next Monday I was the first to wake up for some miraculous reason, but then again I was rested. No one had woken up during the night. Thank God for small miracles.

Cody jumped at my legs. I let him out promising him we'd walk later. I wanted to visit Liz and Ed. So he'd do plenty of walking.

While making breakfast, I called them to make sure Liz's invitation was still available. She confirmed it and insisted we spend the day there. I bet that once lunch was over, they'd throw us out.

Breakfast was bad. Abby and Danny kept fighting about the food.

I wanted that slice. No, I had the butter first. But you ate all the jelly. You can't use a knife!

"Enough!" I shouted making them both grow quiet. "You want more bread? Take from the pan and stop annoying your brother! And you mister, let go of that knife this instant."

After that, they behaved and didn't even look up from their plates.

"We're going to nana and papa today!" I announced to them while washing the dishes. "Isn't it great?"

When no one answered, I turned to find the twins staring at me from their chairs and Cody lounged under the table. Great. They had left.

"You miss nana and papa, right?" I asked the boys, drying my hands on a towel.

They clapped and squealed. That meant yes probably.

"Let's get you dressed. You need to look nice."

Because they wanted to walk, I let them down and on my way upstairs, I knocked on Abby and Danny's door. "Get dressed. We're going out!"

It had been difficult with the space thing, but we moved Danny in Abby's room after extending it a little. They weren't really happy, but it wasn't like they had a choice. I told Abby it was either her bed or the couch when she started screaming. After sleeping on the couch for a few nights, she went back to her room.

We never thought of having so many kids. Hell, we didn't even know how long we'd be in Chicago! The house was perfect for us, and Abby too once she joined us. Danny's arrival meant no guest room. The twins' arrival meant cramming. Big time.

An hour later, we were all dressed and ready to go. I opened the back door of my car and started strapping Tommy to his seat then Willy. I didn't even want to think of how they'd mess with us when they grew up. I made a mental note to never allow them to read 'Harry Potter', because they'd learn lots of bad tricks from Fred and George. I shuddered, finishing the strapping process. Although, the not reading that book was kind of doomed since Abby had seen my collection, and the colors had attracted her. Why did they have to make them colorful?

I expected her to ask any day now. Bella made me promise not to allow her to read it because as it progressed it got violent. Like I didn't know, but it was kinda hypocritical. We were probably a little older than Abby when it all started. If she wanted Harry, she could have him. I'd love to read it with her all over again. For the five-hundredth time.

"Dad!"

I jumped, turning to Danny. "Yeah, buddy?"

"Help me in."

Right. The car was still too big for him, but I didn't regret buying it. Seven seats were more than enough. Cody usually occupied two, the back ones, then came the twins and Danny, Abby loved to ride shotgun when Bella wasn't around.

I turned the radio up, knowing no one dared to shout over the radio. A little peace and quiet.

When I parked in front of the building, I really hoped they'd behave so we get two free meals. I was out of ideas on what to cook them.

With the duffle bag over my shoulder and one twin in each arm, I started ascending to their apartment. Cody ran up ahead and waited by the door, waggling his tail. Abby was the first to reach him and ring the bell, then Danny arrived. By the time Ed answered, I was trudging my feet on the last few steps.

"You're walking when we leave," I muttered, although it was easier to go down.

One twin grinned, and the other gave him a high five. Great, they're plotting my demise.

"Hey, Ed," I greeted him, dropping the boys to the ground. They took off inside.

"Though day?" he asked.

"Though week, and I still don't know when Bella will be back. I'm tired."

We stepped inside, and for the first time I understood him. Barely. But still, I understood why he was angry when I left my shoes in the middle of the hallway. I pushed the shoes on either side of the wall before toeing off my shoes and going to the living room.

I flopped on the couch, occupying it all and not even caring one bit. If I closed my eyes, I'd be asleep in the next second.

"Are they wearing you out?" I heard Liz ask from above me.

"Something like that," I mumbled. "When I said I wanted a lot of kids, I never thought how disobedient they could get."

"They're kids," she said softly. "Maybe you should sleep."

"No way. I can't leave you with them. It's like they've gone crazy since Bella left."

"That's probably your fault too. They listen to her because she knows how to make a point," Liz told me.

"And I don't?" I asked, slightly hurt.

"You just cave to their pleadings."

I rolled my eyes, but didn't disagree. Rearranging my body on the couch, I made her room, sighing heavily.

Abby came in the room and took a seat next to me. "He's doing it again."

I laughed, and Liz joined me. Who thought Ed would turn into this huge child lover? Just to confirm her words, he appeared in the room with Danny clinging to his back and the twins under his arms.

It was surreal and sometimes I was kinda jealous. I never got that treatment. He didn't like me at all.

Liz patted my leg, probably sensing my mood. I patted her hand in return and let my head fall back on the couch, yawning.

"Who wants to see how I make lunch?" she asked loudly. That was all it took for the kids to abandon Ed, and follow her.

"Would it be rude to go into my old room for a nap?" I mumbled, glancing at him.

"You have to share with your dog. He's sprawled all over the bed."

"He's a snuggler," I informed him before retreating for a well-deserved nap.

When I woke up, I realized it was late. It was dark outside. Had I slept through the day? How tired was I?

A loud shriek of glee came from the other side of the door, then loud thumping as if someone was running.

"Nooo!" I heard Danny yelling. "You won't catch me!"

Hopefully, their police calling neighbor had moved away or wasn't home. I'd hate to bust his mouth for calling the cops for disturbance. They were kids. I still couldn't believe he had really called the cops a few times while the kids were here and we couldn't look after them.

Stretching my back, I slipped out of the room and bumped into Ed. He grabbed my arm then my face. It took me a second to see his eyes were covered with a scarf. I tried to move past him, but he gripped me tighter.

"I got one!" he shouted.

"I'm not playing," I muttered.

"Oh, how did I end up here?" He ripped the scarf from his eyes. "I was in the living room."

"Did they spin you?" I asked, yawning. He nodded. "Then you shouldn't be surprised if you ended up in the hallway."

"Speaking from experience?" he asked surprised.

"Yeah. Try playing this in the winter. I kinda left the house…and the door closed. Cool," I muttered.

"Paaaapa!"

Ed rearranged his scarf and I pushed him to the living room. "Left," I whispered. He thought I helped him because he really went left…and bumped into the wall. Oops.

"Food is on the table," Liz told me from the couch where she was feeding one of the twins.

"Thanks."

After more playing, and fruitless catching from Ed, I started hinting we should go home. That's how I ended up blinded by the scarf. Just because karma is a bitch, Ed decided to help me and I kept bumping into stuff. I shouldn't have misguided him. The guy could hold a grudge. I should have known it.

"Come on, Dad! Papa found at least one of us!" Danny whined.

I lunged to my left side and grabbed his arm. "Got ya!"

He huffed, but admitted being caught. He shouldn't have talked.

"Under the table," Ed told me seriously.

"I don't trust you," I muttered, moving my arms in front of me in case the wall was approaching.

"I'm not joking."

I snorted, still blindly seeking for Abby.

"Then you can be here all night," he said amused.

"Where's the damn table?" I hissed. Once there, I went to my knees and felt around. When my hand touched something warm, I realized he wasn't joking…until a wet tongue licked my face.

Everyone was rolling on the floor laughing when I took off the scarf. After glaring at Ed, I went to wash my face.

I pretended to be mad at them for the stunt all the way home. It worked like magic until bedtime when I decided to read them a story. We sat on Abby's bed – me in the middle of them.

"So you aren't really upset?" she whispered.

I glanced at her, pressing my lips together then looked back at the book in my hands. Bella had found a book with _Wall-E_ and decided it would be nice for the kids. Danny liked it more than Abby. _I wonder why._

"Not that again!" she moaned.

"But your brother likes it," I insisted.

"Dad! Can't you read a girl story?"

I sighed. The things I did for her. "Which one?"

"_The Little Match Girl_."

At least in wasn't _Snow White_ again. I jumped out of the bed and went to her little bookcase and searched for the book. When I returned, they were both watching me anxiously.

"Okay, okay. I'm not _that_ mad," I conceded. I wasn't mad at all.

"Yey!" They tackled me to the bed.

After a long group hug, I started reading. I had no idea why Abby liked this so much. It was the saddest child story I'd read in my life.

Halfway through the story, Danny's head fell on my chest, and after hugging him to me, I continued reading on lower tones. I knew Abby would be asleep soon too. And probably I'd fall asleep with them but then my phone started ringing.

"Shit." I grabbed it quickly and silenced it. Bella would be upset I rejected her call.

Once Danny was in his bed, and Abby was tucked in, I retreated to my room, calling Bella.

"Nice," she muttered.

"I didn't want to hang up. I was in the middle of getting them to sleep," I explained, fisting my hair. "Sorry."

"Them, who?" Bella asked.

"Danny and Abby. How are you?"

"Tired." She sighed. "We can switch any time you want. The kids are a walk in the park compared to your sister."

I laughed, lying on the bed, face down. "I know how she can get."

"You tired too? You sound better than yesterday," she noted.

"That's because grandparents are God-sent!" I said seriously. "I took them to Ed and Liz. Then went to my old room and fell asleep," I said chuckling.

"That must have been nice. To nap."

"Oh, you have no idea!" I exclaimed. "The sad part is that I can't sleep now."

"I can't either," she whispered. "Edward, I really miss you."

I scratched my head, considering my next move. "Do you…can you Skype?" I mumbled.

"That's why I called in the first place, but chickened out." Bella giggled.

"We're a match made in Haven. See you in a few," I whispered.

After locking my door and putting the laptop on the bed, I started searching for the charger. Five minutes later, I found it under the bed. When I logged in, Bella was already there, waiting.

"Sorry. I needed the charger. I plan to keep you up all night," I joked.

She didn't say anything, just stared at me. "Oh, I miss you so much, sweetie."

I gulped. "I miss you more." What I wouldn't give to be able to touch her! To feel her close to me. To be inside her. Fuck, I was getting worked up.

"Is everyone sleeping?" Bella asked, shifting on the bed.

"Yep. Out like the light," I confirmed. Then I realized why she wanted to know. Her shirt rolled up, revealing her stomach then her boobs. Fuck. Was she doing what I thought she was doing?

"Bella! What?" I choked up.

"Shh." She freed herself from the shirt and bra. Was she serious?

I got up on my knees and one hand went behind me to take the shirt off while the other was pushing the pants down.

"Is someone eager?" she teased me.

"Are you joking? You have no idea how much I miss you."

That video chat turned out in the best Skype conversation I ever had. It wasn't so much for a conversation. I tried to keep my eyes open and watch Bella touching herself, but my lids kept closing in pleasure.

"I'm so close," she whispered, throwing her head back.

That was my undoing. I tugged at my dick one more time before rolling on my side and pressing my face into her pillow inhaling her scent. My heart was racing as I came down from the amazing high. It had been something, but not exactly what I wanted.

"You're not leaving the bed for a month when you come back," I threatened her.

Bella giggled, wrapping a sheet around her. Now, she was shy.

"I'm not joking, woman! I didn't even get my birthday present," I whined.

"Dream on, honey."

I grumbled, finally facing her again. "I should let you sleep. Don't let my sister tire you down, okay?"

"I'll tell her that you plan to sequester me once I get back!"

"She may kick my ass," I said seriously. "Tell her that I love her."

"I will. Now, you go to sleep. Tomorrow's another wonderful day!" Bella said cheerfully.

"I think you did this on purpose!" I groaned. "But there are so many advantages of being alone!" I teased her.

"Like what? Wank in the bathroom without being ashamed?"

"Ha, ha! You think you're so funny, wife of mine! It has to do with the bathroom and the toilet lid. I'd let you guess. And the socks on the floor. And the chocolate syrup all over the kitchen. Cody in our bed. Watching whatever I want on TV…"

"You're such a guy. I swear, I don't know why I bother with you." She shook her head, but there was a smile playing on her lips.

"You loooveee me!" I said in a singing voice.

"Go to bed. When I'm back, Cody won't sleep with us."

"I'll tell him. Night, love."

"Good night, Edward. I love you."

_Good night, yeah right._ Maybe she was keeping her fingers crossed when she said that. My night was horrible. Like all the previous seven.

I was sure it was William who was in my arms, as I tried to make him sleep. His twin was sleeping while he decided to wake me up. I tried taking him to my bed, but that resulted in a loud wail. Walking around the house, it was. After making the tour of the living room and kitchen three times, I slumped on the couch.

"Can you fall asleep? Please? For me?" I begged him.

"No."

Great. He hated me.

"Your brother is sleeping. Why can't you?" I moaned.

He didn't even try to close his eyes, as he looked at me smiling. I decided it was time for drastic measures. With him balanced in my arm, I rummaged through my old CD collection. I stumbled over stuff that would do anything but make him sleep.

Where were my Classical CDs?

A few more minutes of searching and I found a CD that had LULLABIES written on it. I remembered Bella making it when Abby was little. Perfect. Without hesitation, I inserted it in the player and went back to the couch.

The first song was _Moonlight Sonata_, the second was _Brahms' Lullaby_, then Mozart again.

"Come on, William!" I groaned. "Aren't you one bit tired?"

When the CD played the songs for the third time, he was finally asleep. I carried him to his bed then went to mine.

In the morning, after breakfast, we went to my room and snoozed until the doorbell buzzed loudly. I hoped it was going to be a quiet day. Leaving them sleep, I closed the door behind me and went to answer the front door.

"Hi, Edward. Is Bella home?" Laura, our neighbor, looked worried.

"Hello. No, she's gone," I told her, not entirely awake for conversation.

"Oh, I just wanted to ask something." She shuffled on her feet. "Do you happen to know your way in the kitchen?"

"Sure, I know. What's wrong?" I asked confused.

"Well, Billy's coming down to visit."

"Really?" I grinned. I missed him. "When's he coming?"

"Tonight. I want to surprise him with his favorite cake, and I'm short on a variety of stuff," she said quickly.

I wanted to suggest a trip to the store, but invited her inside to help her. Our mess from breakfast was still all over the kitchen.

"Sorry for this," I said, scratching the nape of my neck. "What did you need?" I asked, stacking dishes and dumping them in the sink

"Where exactly is Bella? Did she take a leave?"

"Something like that," I joked. "My sister is pregnant and she could give birth any day. Bella's with her."

Laura nodded. "Well, I can help you?"

"No, please. I have it under control."

"Daaad! Will or Tom pissed on your bed!" Abby yelled.

I cringed. Had the diaper fallen? Why did that shit happen to me?

Laura patted my arm, and I grimaced at her. She probably loved to paw at me. I mean, she was my number one fan from the beginning.

"Hold on," I said then dashed to my room. Bad idea to let him sleep only in his diaper. The kid was on Bella's pillow and the diaper at the foot of the bed. Fuck.

_Okay, don't panic. Grab the sheet and shove it in the washing machine. I hate that thing._

Pep talks never worked with me.

After washing Tom – I was positive it was him – I made sure his diaper was fastened before I put his clothes on him.

"Sorry for making you wait," I told Laura, stepping back in the kitchen with the kids.

"Do you have two eggs? Butter? Cocoa powder?"

"I don't know about butter," I said, opening the fridge's door. There was only a little. I grabbed two eggs and handed them to her.

The cocoa was in the upper cupboard, and even I had to stretch. Bella did that on purpose, so she could see my shirt ride up.

"Anything else?" I turned to Laura.

"I don't think so."

"Do you have flour and baking soda?" I asked, knowing that baking soda was important. I had learnt my lesson the hard way. My first ever cake looked like a plate, and Bella cried from laughing so much at me.

"I have them." She nodded looking impressed at my knowledge.

"Well, if there's anything else. I'm here." I shrugged.

"Are we making cookies?" Danny asked, cocking his head to me once I returned from closing the door after Laura.

"No, Mrs. Brandon is baking a cake for her son."

"Can we make cookies?" he insisted.

"Let me wash that bed sheet. Go, watch TV or something."

After raiding the house of white clothes, I shoved them in the washing machine. And that was about it. I had no idea how it worked.

Why did I never pay attention to Bella?

Not ready to admit defeat, I searched for the instruction book. Okay, so in the drawer went the smelly shit and the detergent. I was sure Bella never put detergent in the drawer.

Grabbing a fistful of my hair, I dialed her number.

"Take this, it's Edward!" she shouted.

"But this is not my fault!" I heard Jasper moan.

There was bang and a curse then Jasper's voice in the phone. "Edward?"

"Can you put Bella on? It's important," I told him.

"No! Don't kill him!" he shouted. There was definitely a loud mewl. Oh, his cat.

"HEY!" I shouted in the phone.

"Edward, if no one is dying, you better hang up. I'm going to lash out on you," Bella hissed in the phone.

I hung up, realizing it was the best way. I didn't really want to know what Jasper, or his cat had done. If she was with him then Mom was with Alice. She couldn't help either. Fucking epic.

I wanted to kick the washing machine.

I tried Liz, but it went to voicemail.

"NO! No! No!" I moaned, throwing the instruction book on the other side of the bathroom.

The phone vibrated in my hand. Rosalie. What did she want? I was having life crisis here.

"What?" I barked.

"Dear twin of mine called to say you sounded panicked. Do you need help with something?" she asked worried.

"Do you know how to use the washing machine?" I said through gritted teeth.

"Duh!"

"Don't get smart with me! I'm going to explode. Where the fuck does the detergent go? It's liquid," I told her.

"If it's liquid, you pour a cup over the clothes inside. The perfume goes in the drawer, on the thin slop."

"Thanks," I whispered. "I didn't mean to yell...just…"

"It's okay. I totally understand you." Was she real? Had she hit her head? "If your kids are anything like you then I'm sorry for you." Now, that sounded more like the Ice Queen I knew.

"Bi-_cough_-tch."

"Ass-_cough_-hole."

"We can keep this up forever, Rosalie," I said seriously. "Really, thank you for your help. For offering to help. And if what you said is wrong…you're answering to Bella."

"You don't trust me?" she asked, mock hurt.

"Where do I press to make it start?" I asked her once everything was in place.

"There's usually one button. A big one."

I looked at all the buttons then pressed the biggest one.

"Did you change the heat?"

"I didn't touch it. Bella washed white clothes last time."

"My job here is done. Good luck with the kids."

"I need it. Bye."

The day dragged after that. Out of ideas for lunch, I grabbed the Chinese food menu and called them. I promised tons of sweets only not to be rattled to Bella. After the twins were in bed, Abby wanted some help with her homework again. What kind of sadistic teacher did she have? She was nine, for fuck's sake!

That turned out in a Scrabble game until I realized I hadn't seen Danny in about an hour.

"Hold on. Don't cheat," I said sternly before going in search for him. He was in the living room watching some show on Animal Planet. It wasn't as bad as it could have been.

"Aren't you tired?" I asked him.

"Nope."

"When that's over, I'm coming after you. You need a bath."

"Not a bath, Dad!"

"Fine, be dirty." I turned on my heels and returned to my game with Abby.

Wednesday, I took them to the park. Of course, no one was there at lunch time, but it took me the whole morning to get us moving.

We played jump rope, hop-scotch and even soccer ball. I was losing miserably at hop-scotch since my high was all wrong and the stone jumped out of the circle I wanted. It used to be my favorite game. Not so much anymore.

The twins chased Cody around while I kept score on Abby and Danny's soccer game.

We lay on the blanket when they finally looked tired enough. I made them eat the sandwiches I had made home and drink lots of water.

When the sun hid behind the clouds, I decided we should return home. I had a feeling it would rain. They didn't want to go yet.

So we stayed there until it started pouring down. We ran to the car through thunders.

I strapped them to their seats then went behind the wheel.

"No need to worry, okay? Everything is fine," I told them. "Just a little rain."

A huge motherfucking lighting bolt lit the sky quickly following by a booming thunder. Thank you for making a point. I was just trying to make them feel better, stupid summer storm.

We stopped at the gas station on the way back. The clerk eyed us as if we were crazy. _What, dude? It's a storm, not a fucking tornado! _

I loved rain. I lived it the wettest part of the country, up until I moved to the windiest part.

"Can we buy gummy bears?" Abby asked, holding the packet to me.

"Yep. Pump five," I told the clerk, who was still looking shocked. _What the fuck is wrong with him?_

"You can't have that!" I heard Abby shouting.

Danny was hugging a sports magazine to his chest.

"You don't even know how to read!" she insisted.

"I want it. Cars."

"You can have it," I told him. "But give it here so the boy can ring it."

"No!" Danny shouted.

"Danny, he has to tell us the price. We can't take it without buying it." I crouched to him. "I'll give it back to you in a second." I tugged at the magazine until I had it pried from his little hands.

The boy told me the total and I handed him my card. I spread the purchases back to their owners. I had just a bill and less money. At the last moment possible – just as I was leaving – the boy called my name.

Only when I was facing him I realized he shouldn't have known my name. Why he looked weird… It fell into place. He recognized me.

"Yeah?" I tried to play it casually. Maybe I forgot something.

"Would you mind terribly to sign this?" He held a piece of paper to me.

I grabbed the pen, keeping an eye on the kids who had gone to the car. "Name?" I asked.

"Anthony."

My hand shook literally, but I took a huge gulp of air and scribbled his name there along with some words and my signature.

Finally, we made it back home. Too late, I realized Cody's paws were dirty. Now, the tiles were just as dirty. Fuck me.

With some pleadings from my side, the twins had fallen asleep some time ago, and Abby was entertaining her brother while I was mopping the floor. Sweet.

We hadn't eaten much, and I knew that cooking was the last possible thing on my mind. So I called Liz. Her food was the best I tasted, but that was because I was famished.

If I only knew that was the beginning of hell, I'd have cherished the day.

Day eleven, but who was counting?

It was a turning point. If I survived the crisis that arose, I was a trooper.

Being finally alone, tired, sore and fucking lonely, I was deep in memories of the first time I met Bella when my door banged to the wall making me jump.

"Daddy! I feel funny," Abby moaned and fell next to me.

"Funny? How so?" I asked, switching the lamp on. A hand on her forehead confirmed my suspicious.

The cold rain had done it.

"Stay here, I'll grab the thermometer."

When I returned, Danny had joined Abby on my bed. And he was crying.

"What happened? Why are you awake?" I asked him, handing Abby the thermometer.

"I'm sorry," Danny mumbled.

He looked truly distressed. "You're forgiven." I had no idea why he was apologizing. "Now, go back to bed."

"I can't! You're really not upset?"

I was missing on something.

The thermometer beeped. Crap. That was high. After I gave her a pill, I tried to coax Danny back into his bed. He refused, planting his little feet on the hardwood of the hallway.

"Danny, come on, buddy. Your sister is sick."

I flipped the light on in their room and fought hard against my gag reflex. He had thrown up. Fuck me. Why was this happening when I was alone? Why?

"Why didn't you tell me you aren't feeling well?" I groaned, grabbing his shoulders.

He bit his lip, looking just as cute as Bella.

"Do you feel warm?" He didn't have a fever.

"No. But my tummy hurts."

I leaned to grab his hand to lead him back to my room when he heaved over my feet. Super.

_Bella, I need you._

Washing, redressing, pumped with pills and Abby's book choice, we snuggled in my bed. I guess it was Harry time, finally.

Danny was draped over me, moaning from time to time. I wasn't going to judge. I acted worse when I was sick. Abby listened to everything, and when I told her to read for herself, she insisted that she was too tired. I let it pass because she was sick.

Over the next few days, I kept them away from the twins. Until I realized it had been in vain. They still got the cold.

Every time I made more soup, washed vomit or just stayed there with one of them, I thought of how much I needed Bella. She hadn't called after that fight she had with Jasper, but we exchanged a few texts.

On day twenty three, I woke up to my ring tone. I grabbed the phone from the nightstand and answered quietly. Everyone was in my bed, from the twins to Cody and a dozen stuffed animals.

"Yeah?" I whispered, yawning loudly.

Things were back under control thankfully.

"Morning, honey!"

"Morning, love. Long time, no talk."

"I know. I'm sorry. I was beyond busy. The texts weren't enough. How are the kids?"

"Alive and kicking."

"Cut the crap, Cullen. You know I'm worried."

"I'm not joking. Everyone is okay. For a few days now. Stupid rain," I muttered.

I started making coffee when the clock caught my eye. Three in the fucking morning.

"Why did you call at this hour?" I moaned, shuffling to the couch where I fell unceremoniously.

"I have big news!" she exclaimed.

"Did Alice give birth? Is she okay?"

"Yes. They're super cute! Your newest niece name is Olivia Isabella. Alice couldn't resist. And your newest nephew name is Oliver Jasper."

"Oliver and Olivia. So…sweet," I muttered.

"Don't say a word to Alice. She thinks it's perfect. She has a book on this thing."

"That doesn't surprise me," I said seriously. "Congratulate them from me. I'll call in the morning. I'm going back to bed now," I added.

"I will. And I love you."

"I love you too, Bella. This means you're coming home?" I asked hopefully.

"In a week or so."

A week? I wanted to cry.

When we really woke up that day it was over nine in the morning. I guess the past week had been hard on everyone. I told them about their cousins and called Jasper. After I talked to him for a few minutes, I handed the phone to Abby. She was really excited about this.

After breakfast, Billy visited and I hadn't been happier for a distraction. We moved to the backyard. The kids seemed to actually play nice for once, while I caught up with my friend.

Billy loved college. He had been worried about it, but I always told him that college is the best time in the world.

"It's so much fun! And the parties! Man, I wish I could go to them all," he told me with a huge smile.

"But you're not doing stupid things, right?" I asked.

"If by stupid things you mean drugs, then no. But I may drink… don't tell Mom."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Don't worry. I know all about that. The hangovers are a pain in the ass, huh?"

"Yeah," he mumbled. "Especially when I have class first thing in the morning."

"I know all about it, Billy. Try playing basketball with a motherfucking hangover and have your coach yelling at you. Those are the moments you'll remember, though." I laughed. "If I could do it again, I won't change a thing. Okay maybe…I won't be such an ass. And I definitely won't waste time waiting for Bella." I grinned.

"Oh." His face fell. "The long distance thing didn't work for Anna. She's at Stanford, you know?"

"I thought everything was okay. Last year."

"Yeah, it wasn't working. I was just telling people everything was okay." He shrugged. "And I decided to just stop worrying about girls. I guess, school is more important now."

"Well, you computer geniuses can have anyone you want," I said amused.

He turned red. "Just because I'm studying MIT, doesn't mean I'm a genius," Billy grumbled.

"What are your grades?"

"Why didn't you become a lawyer?" he retorted making me laugh.

After I asked if he still played, he said that not as often as he would have liked. Then I challenged him to a game. It had been a while since I played. My last game, probably.

We spent the whole day outside and thanks to Billy's mom, we had free lunch. She insisted. I wasn't going to turn her down.

In the afternoon, Abby wanted to water the flowers. Of course, Danny grabbed the hose and sprayed everyone. It turned out messy. Water and wet dirt and kids. Perfect.

Maybe I could put them in the washing machine too, I thought amused.

I sent Billy – the cleanest of us – to bring towels from inside. The water was shut off, but I was dripping from head to toe. It was always the innocent bystander that got hurt. That was me in this situation.

I took my shirt off and wrung it as I watched the kids running and slipping on the wet ground. I was suddenly glad Bella was miles away. They looked like little pigs after having rolled in mud all day. Bath time.

When I heard steps, I thought it was Billy, but too late I realized it was his mom. Great. I wished she'd stop staring.

"Four towels coming up!" Billy shouted rushing out the house. "Hey, Mom." He skidded to a halt and I saved the towels right before he fell.

Once Laura stopped ogling me, she offered to help me wash the kids. I appreciated it. While she was with the twins, I threw all the clothes in the washing machine, proud that I knew how to use it. Then I went to see how Abby was doing. She was already washed and Danny had taken her place in the tub.

I washed him quickly before going to see if Laura needed help. I was surprised to find the twins washed and redressed on my bed. That was quick.

"Already?" I blurted out.

"They were really good," she told me. "It was a challenge to remember how to put a diaper on, but I figured it out." She laughed. "Here, good as new."

"Thank you so much. I mean it. I would probably be lost right now," I admitted.

"You're welcome. I told you to ask if you need help. And put a shirt on you, hun." She winked before leaving the room.

I felt my cheeks turning red as I snatched a clean t-shirt. The boys were giggling from the bed.

"What?" I barked teasingly. "Laughing at your dad? That's not very nice."

"Fun," they said together.

Fun outside? Or fun what just happened?

I scowled at them. It was so fucking embarrassing. I knew that Laura was mostly all talk, no action, but there were some women like her out there who were ten times worse.

Something had to go wrong. Of course. I had been too distracted when I washed the clothes so Abby's favorite shirt was ruined, along with the twins' clothes. She threw a tantrum for having her favorite shirt destroyed. I promised to buy her a new one, but she had none of it.

I found myself begging for Bella to return already.

That night, I crossed off another day. It looked a lot like a prison chart.

On day thirty-five, I brought up the Twister game. After fighting and whining, I went to Billy to ask if he wanted to help us. He said he wasn't playing. I promised he just had to instruct us what to do.

It was a funny sight, I was sure. I mean, I was huge in comparison with the kids so no one should have been surprised when I won. Abby demanded a re-match. I still won.

I told her to play alone with her brother when one of Billy's old high school friends called him. She agreed only because she was upset she lost.

Ten minutes into their game, they were twisted together and I was afraid they'd hurt themselves. After instructing their next move, my phone rang.

"Mommy!" Danny shouted and moved away making Abby fall and huff.

Glancing at the caller ID, I saw it wasn't mommy. It was Coach.

"Not mommy, sorry, kids," I whispered.

The week Bella had promised to come back had come and gone.

"Hello?" I asked, praying I didn't have to meet up with anyone. It was summer holiday after all.

I had to go to a photo shoot for a calendar and another one for a magazine and an interview. The next day. I tried to explain that I couldn't, but agreed in the end when Coach started shouting. It was going to be interesting. At least it started at ten. A decent hour.

The people at the studio were amazing and loved the kids. I knew half of them so I trusted them to keep an eye on them while I finished with everything.

They made us try twelve different sets of clothes. Suits, jackets, jeans, ties, ripped shirts, different angles, strange positions. I was more tired than after a day with the kids.

The photographer asked who wanted to see their photos. I definitely didn't want that. All I wanted was to get on with the stupid interview and go home to sleep.

When the calvary was done, I was surprised to see the kids quiet. They were on a couch, watching cartoons on a TV in the corner of the dressing room.

By the time we made it home, it was late in the afternoon and once the twins were in their beds, having fallen asleep in the car, I asked if anyone else was tired because I was ready to nap. Abby and Danny joined me in my room and after snuggling up, we fell asleep.

Bella texted to tell me that she may stay a few more days since Mom had gone home. Did Dad need more help than me? I was sure someone was delusional.

I was literally going crazy. True, I helped Bella with the kids, but I was never here all day, everyday. How the hell was she still sane?

I did my best to keep them distracted. The park. Nana and Papa. The store. Ice cream. Backyard. Games. Baking cookies.

If someone cut me, I'd probably bleed coffee since it was the only liquid in my system.

By day forty, they grew irritable, wanting Bella. Yeah, I wanted Bella too. That made them even more annoying at times. Danny wouldn't eat until I had Bella on the phone to talk to him. The twins would take hours to fall asleep.

Abby seemed the only one okay with me, so I spent more time with her. For my sanity's sake.

I was currently working on a puzzle game with Danny when she came to me. The textbook in her hand made me groan.

"School again?" I asked.

"Yeah." She nodded. "I have to learn all the presidents," she moaned. "It's one boy's fault for not knowing who was before Bush."

I closed my eyes, taking a huge breath. "I'm sorry, kid, but is your teacher crazy? _I_ don't know all the presidents!" I shouted.

"Daddy, please. It's already August."

"Is it now?" I asked surprised. How long had Bella been gone?

"It's August the second," she told me seriously.

Fucking shit. That meant it had been forty-three days since Bella left.

"Can you do this alone, buddy?" I raised an eyebrow at Danny. He nodded, not looking at me. "I miss mommy too. She'll be home soon, okay?" I stroked his head, but he moved away.

If she wasn't back by the end of the week, I was dragging her ass back here. It was too much.

I went to the couch with Abby and her book.

"What do you want me to do?"

"Tell me a name and I'll tell you the number," she said quietly.

"Did you learn them already?" I was surprised.

"No, Daddy! I just read them twice. It's hard."

I bet. If she got a bad grade, I'd go to school and give that teacher a piece of my mind on this shit.

I looked at the list in my hands. "Let's see…" I searched for a common name. "Jefferson."

"Twice and the third."

"You have to know how many terms he had too?" I groaned.

She nodded. "But I don't remember the party."

"Democratic-Republican," I told her. "Lincoln?"

"Sixteenth. Republican. Once?"

"Yep. He was assassinated," I explained.

"Can you ask something harder?"

"Grover Cleveland?"

She shot me a curious look. I grinned. She said she wanted harder. "Dunno."

"Republican, once and he was the twenty-third," I supplied. "Theodore Roosevelt?"

"Twenty five. Twice?"

"Twenty-sixth. Yes, twice. Republican." I nodded. I skimmed through the names, trying to find another hard one. To my shame, I didn't even know some of them.

"The other Roosevelt was the thirty-second," she quipped when I didn't ask anything.

"Democratic and three terms," I told her. "He was very important for our history." She'd learn more in the next years. "So…Kennedy?"

"Thirty-fifth, once…I don't know the party."

"Democratic. Eisenhower?" I asked.

She shrugged.

We continued like that until I reached my days.

"Bush?"

"Father or son?" Abby asked, smirking.

"Both." We should up the game.

"Well, Bush the Father was the forty-first, only once and a Republican. Bush the Son was the forty-third, twice and same party as his dad." She beamed at me.

I clapped and show her both my thumbs making the book close, which made us giggle.

"Which one didn't your classmate know?" I asked.

"The president before Bush the Father," she answered.

"And you do?" I teased.

"Jimmy Carter."

"Wrong." I poked my tongue at her. "It was Reagan. Carter was before Reagan."

She huffed, folding her arms over her chest. "Between the Bush family was Clinton," she told me, trying to show me that she knew something.

I laughed. "You're correct. And the next president?"

She rolled her eyes. "Obama."

I laughed and decided to ask her more later. It was still holiday.

A few more days passed and I was seriously considering going after Bella. I couldn't do this for much longer on my own.

Then, on Saturday night, coincidently day forty-five, Bella gave me the best news ever. In two days she was back. I wished I could kiss her via phone.

I might have told her about how much I loved her for about half an hour before I allowed the kids to talk to her. Even the twins said that they missed her, in their own way. While they talked, I was struck with the best plan to keep them under control the next day.

In the morning, once everyone was fed and chocolate washed from their faces, we were on the way to the store. We needed supplies for my idea.

Only when we stopped in the parking lot of the store I told them what was going on.

"So, kids…I have an idea." I grinned madly, wishing they'd reciprocate. They looked bored and Abby was giving me a look that said 'Dad, don't hurt yourself.'

"Would you like to make a surprise for mommy?" I asked. They all nodded, suddenly looking fucking enthusiastic. "We can make cookies. Or a cake? And we can make a huge banner to welcome her back."

Everyone agreed with me. Like they had a choice.

Twins in the cart, we started our shopping. Alice should be proud of me.

We bought ingredients for a chocolate cake. Hopefully Sylvia would put up with me on the phone and help me make that mocha cake, if not…I'd make the ever classic cake. Besides that, I grabbed a big roll of white cardboard, crayons, glitter and glue. It was going to get messy. A lot messy.

Everyone was extra hyper on the way home. Danny kept asking if he could do something or another to the banner. I promised he could do whatever he wanted, but he had to allow his sister to use the scissors.

I installed them in the living room with everything they needed, while I went to the kitchen to work on the cake. Sylvia was reluctant to give up her recipe, but I begged. Worked like magic. I'd probably pay half of my next salary on the phone bill, but at least the cake would be just as good as hers.

Once the cake was in the oven, I thanked her multiple times and promised to take a picture and send it to her. She reminded me to be careful with cutting it and putting enough syrup in it along with the cream. I reassured her that I wrote everything carefully.

Before starting the cream, I went to check on the kids. They were all huddled over the banner, painting, gluing, cutting, glittering. I didn't disturb them, but I stayed there for a while to just watch them. If I knew handiwork would keep them entertained I would have done it days ago.

The cake was done, along with our late lunch. While we ate, I asked for their opinion on what to write on the cake.

"Happy birthday," Danny said seriously.

"But it's not mommy's birthday," I reminded him. "Cakes aren't only for birthdays."

"Welcome home," Abby suggested.

"I think the banner says enough for that. We need something short…and sweet."

"Mommy," Tommy said shrugging his little shoulders.

"How about, 'we love you mommy'?" Abby asked uncertain.

"Perfect!" I exclaimed. "How's the banner going?"

"It's good you bought so much cardboard. We're on the third one. They kept messing it up," Abby said upset, nodding to the twins.

"They're too little to understand, honey. I'll put them to a nap so you can work on the banner with Daniel."

After putting the twins to a nap, I was sucked into the banner making process. And only when everyone was in bed, I realized I still had to decorate Bella's cake. Damn. Kids can be distracting.

My hand shook violently as I tried to write nicely. In the end, I managed to write 'WE LOVE YOU' with big, fat ass letters. 'Mommy' was going to be a small word. And good-bye to edge decoration. Maybe I should have watched Cake Boss more.

Cake in the refrigerator, kitchen scrubbed squeaky clean. On to scrubbing the living room floor.

Fuck. My eyes bugged out when I saw the mess. Even Cody was sparkling. Poor dog. First thing, I hung the banner above the stairs then put the other two near the wall in the living room. They looked nice, except the few lines cutting through the words. Then I started scrubbing the sparkling floor.

"You need a bath too," I told Cody. "Don't shake!" I shouted. "Bathroom."

Almost an hour later, I was toweling a dog that wasn't staying fucking put. He kept shaking off the water, making me smell like wet dog.

When I finally took my own shower and then went to bed, I was shocked to see the hour. One in the fucking morning.

When I woke up, I felt a warm body next to me and thinking I was dreaming I hugged the body closer. Until it moved.

Was Bella back? I didn't open my eyes in case I was wrong.

I should have known better. It was Cody.

"This is the last night you spend here," I told him seriously as I rolled out of the bed. After he was outside, I put the bed sheet in the hamper, spreading a clean one on the bed before starting the coffee. I had a text from Bella that she had landed about forty minutes ago. She should be home soon.

The pancakes were waiting on the table when the kids started appearing in the kitchen. It was like waiting for Santa.

"Nope, she's not here yet," I told Danny as he looked hopefully around the kitchen. "You two need to be punished for the mess in the living room," I added seriously.

No one actually ate. We were too excited to function normally.

I was pleading Will to finish his milk when the doorbell rang.

"YEEEEEEE!"

I might have gone deaf. I was literally tackled to the ground as Abby, Danny and Cody rushed to the front door.

"Mooommmmy!" Danny shouted.

I was on my feet the next second, putting the twins down before going in the hallway.

Forty-fucking-seven days without her. Bella was crouched, hugging them tightly, even allowing Cody to nuzzle her face.

Damn. I missed her so fucking much. I couldn't stop staring at her. Her hair looked longer as it was caught in a pony tail, she had a tan, and when her brown eyes met mine I had to resist the urge to burst in tears.

Slowly, she disentangled from the kids and walked to me. The second she was in my arms, where she belonged, I squeezed her close. Her legs came around my waist and my mouth pressed against hers. If we didn't have an audience, I'd probably have fucked her right there.

"Hey, sweetheart," Bella whispered, cupping my cheeks. "I see you're alive."

"Hi," I mumbled against her lips. "I have no idea how you do it. You're an angel." I held her tighter.

"Look up, Mommy!" Danny squealed with glee.

My time was already cut short. I knew it would be rude to ship the kids to nana and papa. They missed her too.

Bella looked up and her eyes lit up. "Oh, it's so pretty."

I finally put her down.

"We did it," Abby said proudly.

"Aw, guys. Thank you so much." She hugged them again. I was surprised all four could fit in her short arms. "Did you help them?" she asked me, grinning.

"No, Daddy was on the phone with Sylvia."

I narrowed my eyes at Abby. Perfect. Give me away.

Bella laughed, shaking her head. Maybe she didn't suspect anything.

"What did you bring us?"

"Yes, did you find something nice there?"

"Mommy miss!"

I wasn't sure if she had time to shop, but when Bella grabbed her bag, I knew there would be presents.

There were candies, pictures of Alice and the babies, and more sweets. Suddenly, Bella jumped off the couch, rushing to the hallway. Her other bag was still there.

"Okay, I think you'll like this. I can't believe I forgot about him," she said loudly. "Close your eyes. All of you."

I had missed her too much to comply. When she returned, I choked on my spit. She had to be fucking kidding! There was damn cat in her hands.

Bella narrowed her eyes at me for not listening to her, but I was too shocked to take my eyes off the small, reddish cat. She sat on my lap, and I immediately hugged her tightly.

"Open your eyes," she whispered.

There was a collective 'aww' and 'how cute' before Abby took the cat. Maybe, if I asked Cody nicely, he'd eat it.

Bella elbowed me in the stomach as if knowing my murderous thoughts. I wasn't a cat person. I hated cats.

The whole day was spent gravitating around Bella. Everyone had missed her so much that we didn't leave her out of sight. If Danny wasn't hugging her waist, Abby was on her, and if they weren't, the twins were in her arms, then there was Cody. The slobber made her walk him in the afternoon, not even looking at me. I barely got a smile or a kiss in between. I was the one that missed her, that had needed her the most!

So when night finally came and everyone was asleep, I could finally have her for myself. I locked the door of our room and slipped in the bathroom.

The mirror was already foggy from the steam. I shed my clothes quickly and stepped in the tub behind her. Bella was busy lathering her bent leg with shower gel when I wrapped my arms around her.

"Couldn't stay away?" she teased.

"Are you fucking kidding now?" I groaned, biting her earlobe. "If it were up to me, I'd have had you the second you stepped inside, but I allowed the kids to share you."

"So gracious, Cullen." She turned in my arms, linking her wrists behind my neck. "I missed you so much, Edward."

"Not as much as I missed you. There were times I thought I was going crazy." I nuzzled her nose.

Her fingers wrapped in the hair at the nape of my neck. "I need you. Here," Bella rasped. "Please."

I fell to my knees and wrapped one of her legs around my neck before going for my present. I didn't need candies, pictures, or a damn cat when I had what I fucking wanted right in front of me. Bella whimpered as I parted her folds with my fingers then delved my tongue deep into her. Fuck. So delicious. It's been a long ass time since I enjoyed my wife's pussy.

"Edward!" she moaned, grabbing my hair.

To my surprise, her walls clamped on my tongue and she came hard. It's been too fucking long. I hoped I wouldn't embarrass myself once I dived home.

"Oh, _shit_! Crap. Ed-waaard!"

I looked up knowing what I'd see. Her body was arched up, her head was leaning against the tile making her look glorious. I always loved to watch her fall apart. I drank everything she gave me and only stopped lapping when Bella trembled in my arms.

Slowly, I lowered her. She fell on top of me, mumbling something I couldn't understand. Before I could suggest moving to our bed, Bella's hand was gripping my dick, guiding me inside.

I wanted to stop her because I'd come embarrassingly fast.

I wanted to stop her because I wanted to take my time.

I wanted to stop her because I wanted nothing more than to slam her against the wall and take her hard and fast.

All thoughts were gone when our hipbones touched. I was deep inside her warm body. The angle was awkward and neither of us satisfied, so I slipped out of her and stood up.

"I promise to take my time when we make it to the bed," I murmured against her lips after I raised her. "But now I want you here. Hard. Fast."

Bella looked dazed at me. I pushed her against the wall and without warning, I raised her legs and slammed inside her tight pussy. She clutched to me. Always afraid I'd drop her. Then I started moving and I knew we were too loud, but I couldn't stop groaning and shouting out. Every push and pull brought me closer and closer to a motherfucking much anticipated orgasm. Bella was clawing at my back, meeting me thrust by thrust, screaming my name over and over.

Then it happened. Her eyes widened, her mouth fell open and she clamped down on me. I must have yelled but I wasn't sure. Every nerve ending in my body exploded along with my release.

We just stood there under the spray for what felt like hours. My legs were fucking trembling.

"Don't drop me," Bella hissed against my neck.

"I got you, babe," I joked making her bite the skin under my ear.

"Don't go all Sonny and Cher on me, either."

"I won't drop you," I groaned. "How many times did I drop you?" I asked, gently putting her feet down. It was a bad thing to say.

"Do I have to remind you?" she shot back wearing a huge grin.

"In college?" I raised an eyebrow at her. "Well, that was all the stairs' fault."

Bella burst in laughter, grabbing the shower head. "Let's just wash."

When we stepped out of the shower, I wrapped her in a fluffy, white towel, but Bella managed to wrap us both in the huge thing. It felt incredible to have her so close. She smelled like her body wash and me and sex.

We walked to the bedroom tangled in the towel and stopped at the foot of the bed. She looked down, between us and giggled.

"You're so…white!"

"Don't joke! You're not allowed. And how did you get a tan? I thought you stayed inside with Alice?" I asked, flinging the towel away.

We fell on the bed when Bella kicked me in the shin making me lose balance. "We stayed outside. It was really nice in the afternoon."

"I bet," I mumbled. "You sure had it easy. Unlike me."

"You look so adorable when you pout, Edward!" Bella rolled on top of me and kissed my neck.

"And you're so mean! You left for forty-seven days!" I exclaimed, grabbing her hips.

"Did you count?" she asked surprised, meeting my eyes.

"One thousand one hundred and twenty-eight hours," I added with a cheeky grin.

"Aw! When you say it like that…"

"It breaks your heart for leaving an unsuspected husband alone with four spawns of Satan?" I supplied, fighting off my smile.

"Actually, it sounds like you had a lot of free time so you could count to the hour. Did you count the minutes too?" she asked smirking.

"You're evil, woman! I think you like to see me in pain."

"You can be such a drama queen!" Bella laughed.

"Bella, I don't know how they act around you, but they were absolutely crazy the past two months! And what in God's name was in your head to buy a cat?" I shouted.

"I didn't buy Spiky! Jasper's cat got the neighbor's cat pregnant. The neighbor wanted to give them away. Alice threatened to kill Jasper if he got another cat. He's still got Spiky. That's why we were fighting when you called that day. I lied to Alice that I wanted him when she saw the kitten."

I rolled my eyes. "Jasper owes you big. _Huge_."

"He knows that," Bella told me smiling.

I cupped her cheeks, moving her hair away before bringing her face closer. Our lips mashed together and I pried hers open until our tongues were tangled. When we had to come up for air, I rolled us so she was under me then round two started.

Hours later, when I lost count of how many times I made her come and we finished our third round of 'welcome home' sex, we lay under the sheet, tangled up. Bella moved her feet until they were between mine and our arms were around each to her. Worked with me. As close as humanly possible was perfect.

"Tell me about the madness," she whispered in my chest.

"Where do I begin?" I wondered, nudging her head so she would look up. After I kissed her again, I delved into the story of what had happened while she was gone and made her promise to never leave me alone again. Ever.

Once we lapsed in silence, Bella gasped, her eyes widening. What happened now? I was really tired.

"What?" I mumbled, keeping my eyes closed.

"You didn't happen to throw the twins a party, did you?"

"Uh, no. We baked cookies and I bought them a cake in form of a car." I shrugged. "I thought you wanted to be here for the actual celebration."

"You're so full of shit, Edward!" she moaned, slapping my shoulder. "I'm sure they wouldn't have been upset to have two parties."

"Well, you called and talked to them… I bought them cake and some toys."

"Edward," Bella groaned. "We need to have a party. Didn't you have parties on your birthdays?" she whispered, biting her lip.

I rolled my eyes. My birthdays were something I didn't want to think about. I didn't even think they threw one party in the years I stayed with them. The first birthday party I could remember was on my tenth birthday. Esme had made such a big thing out of it…

"They didn't?" she gasped when I didn't answer.

"They gave me some cake," I answered. "My birthdays here were _super fun_. Honestly Bella, I have no idea what to do for a birthday party! You organized every party we had for the kids," I muttered.

She looked sad and I hoped she wasn't going to cry because of me. That was the last thing I needed.

Sighing, I hugged her to me, kissing her hair. "You can start working on the best delayed birthday party anyone ever had in the morning," I whispered.

I felt her nod against my chest. We settled for sleep, and when I was already half-way to sleep land, I heard Bella asking me if a bounce house was a good idea. If she commented on that in the morning, I'd say I was asleep and didn't hear her.

**I hope you enjoyed Daddyward in all his glory.**

**Leave me a review.  
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**Thank you to all of you who were around for the whole story (main + outtakes).  
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